Why do people make excuses for their careers?
A story. A very good friend of mine that I went to High School with always wanted to be a writer. We used to draw comic books back in Chemistry class. (1996-1997) I could see early on that he had not only a knack for storytelling, but illustration as well.
Time past, we both graduated and went about our ways. I ran into him in Atlanta about two years ago. I was eating at local spot that will remain nameless. He was a cook, working the night shift. I made sure to sit up by the front of the bar so we could talk and catch up.
Right off the bat I am all like “Man, what about what we used to talk about in class. What about you wanting to be a writer? What about that book you were writing? Are you still doing that stuff?” He replied, “Yeah, every now and then. I more moonlight as a writer now; but I have realized that doing stuff like that is not realistic. I mean, you can’t make money doing it.”
So, now life has pretty much got him caught up in the grind, cooking at a local joint, probably making minimum wage. After that was said, I come back with, “Well, are you wanting to go to school?” He say’s, “I would love to, but there is no way I can afford anything like that. Schools cost a lot of money bro, and I have rent to pay”. Right after that comment, he admitted that he hated his job more than anything.
Of course, I had a comeback to that right away. I grew up with pretty much nothing at all. When I realized that I wanted to transfer to The Art School, I was well aware it would not be cheap. Having to tell them I did not really have contact with my Mom was not easy either. (They needed all this BS paperwork with signatures from both parents. Sorry, not going to happen.) the main point is that I had a determination. I was going to go to Art School and become a designer no matter what it took. It was the drive to make a better life for myself; not only that but I was going to follow my childhood dream of being an artist.
After telling him this, I think it pretty much soured all his excuses and reasons he could not be doing it. He said it actually inspired him and he would look into it. I was really excited leaving thinking maybe I was helping change someone’s life.
Long story short, I visited that same local joint not all that long ago. To my surprise, he was still there as a cook. We had a similar conversation and he had pretty much given up on any thought of following his dreams. I asked why and it seemed all I got was the same excuses. “School is too expensive, I have bills to pay, I don’t have time for that now.” Day’s turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, etc. Before you realize it, everyone has moved on and you are trapped.
The way I see it, you have the rest of your life to live and work your ass off. Why not make smart choices, and invest in your future. School loans can be paid back; it’s an investment in yourself. Follow your dreams because you only grow older and can loose sight as time goes on it you don’t go after it. My good friend may wake up one day and realize that he has to just go after it to make it happen. Or, he may not.
Time past, we both graduated and went about our ways. I ran into him in Atlanta about two years ago. I was eating at local spot that will remain nameless. He was a cook, working the night shift. I made sure to sit up by the front of the bar so we could talk and catch up.
Right off the bat I am all like “Man, what about what we used to talk about in class. What about you wanting to be a writer? What about that book you were writing? Are you still doing that stuff?” He replied, “Yeah, every now and then. I more moonlight as a writer now; but I have realized that doing stuff like that is not realistic. I mean, you can’t make money doing it.”
So, now life has pretty much got him caught up in the grind, cooking at a local joint, probably making minimum wage. After that was said, I come back with, “Well, are you wanting to go to school?” He say’s, “I would love to, but there is no way I can afford anything like that. Schools cost a lot of money bro, and I have rent to pay”. Right after that comment, he admitted that he hated his job more than anything.
Of course, I had a comeback to that right away. I grew up with pretty much nothing at all. When I realized that I wanted to transfer to The Art School, I was well aware it would not be cheap. Having to tell them I did not really have contact with my Mom was not easy either. (They needed all this BS paperwork with signatures from both parents. Sorry, not going to happen.) the main point is that I had a determination. I was going to go to Art School and become a designer no matter what it took. It was the drive to make a better life for myself; not only that but I was going to follow my childhood dream of being an artist.
After telling him this, I think it pretty much soured all his excuses and reasons he could not be doing it. He said it actually inspired him and he would look into it. I was really excited leaving thinking maybe I was helping change someone’s life.
Long story short, I visited that same local joint not all that long ago. To my surprise, he was still there as a cook. We had a similar conversation and he had pretty much given up on any thought of following his dreams. I asked why and it seemed all I got was the same excuses. “School is too expensive, I have bills to pay, I don’t have time for that now.” Day’s turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, etc. Before you realize it, everyone has moved on and you are trapped.
The way I see it, you have the rest of your life to live and work your ass off. Why not make smart choices, and invest in your future. School loans can be paid back; it’s an investment in yourself. Follow your dreams because you only grow older and can loose sight as time goes on it you don’t go after it. My good friend may wake up one day and realize that he has to just go after it to make it happen. Or, he may not.
posted by eric shoemaker at
9:31 PM
3 Comments:
Everyone has opportunities, regardless of where they are from or how they were raised. When I was younger I hated the college courses that I was 'told' to take, became bored, and went into the Marines and volunteered for a place called Viet Nam.
After that I got back into the work force and never got back into school. I'm now almost 60 and regret it to this day. I did, however make myself one promise. My two kids were not going to end up where I am. I swore to them that if I had to work three jobs and take three loans, I would help them get through school. That they could take the course that they wanted. The deal was pretty straight-forward. You get the grades and I'll pay for it. If you don't, you are on your own.
Now I have two (grown) kids with excellent educations that I will be proud of till the day I die. And a promise is a promise.
I'll never make much money, but I'll pay for what my kids have put their hard work into, and do it proudly. The world can take all your possessions when you are gone, but your kids are your legacy to the world......
Yea bro, we've all been there. We've all made excuses. Some of us figure it out later than others. Years ago I said I would live in NY. Now, 9 years after that promise to myself, I'm finally here. My sister is another example. From dropping out of highschool, homeless on the streets, traveling the country working odd jobs here and there, she finally at 25 to get her GED, get a Bachelors degree in english (graduated cum laude) and went on to get her Masters (cum laude again).
Its all a process. Yes, there are hurdles, but nothing is easy and it all takes time. Continue to encourage your friend, you never know, 3,4 10 years from now he may thank you for it.
Living for three and a half years on minimum wage in the 2nd most expensive city in the U.S. was hard. Working minimum wage on top of trying to learn whatever I could at an unpaid internship was *really* hard. But now, I'm doing exactly what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. Hard work is hard, but it can transform your life in palpable ways.
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